Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Math made possible by my college education

It's a pretty sad day when you realize that you're worth more dead than alive.  If I were to die today and leave all of my organs intact (I am an organ donor), with an average selling price of $13,000.00 per organ (you don't want to know how I know that), I would be worth approximately $117,000.00.  Throw on top of that a modest $1,000,000.00 life insurance policy, and I'm worth a total of $1,117,000.00.  Not too shabby if you ask me.  If you divide that number by the amount of money I make per year right now (which seems highly unlikely to change any time soon), I would have to work another 56 years just to break even.  That puts me at 88 years of age and still working.  It would be nice to live for 88 years, but unfortunately for us white males, the average life span is 70-78 years.  Even if we go on the high end, that still leaves me 10 years, or $200,000.00 short.  When you consider that I'll be working every day of my life, it looks like I'll probably be closer to that 70 year mark, making me about $360,000.00 short.  I can throw in the current debt that I have to make the numbers look even worse, but I think I've proven my point.  In case I haven't though, take a gander at the illustration below and see if that clarifies it for you.

Totally unrelated question: Know anyone in the Chicago area that is hiring?  Or more specifically, do you know anyone that would hire me?

5 comments:

Syar said...

How Amazing Illustrations of Stick Figures and Real Life Situations Incorporated haven't hired you yet still boggles the mind!

Incidentally, how much would you be worth if you came back as a zombie? Just, curious minds want to know.

Madelyn said...

you have life insurance?

Cofo said...

You could always sell your organs before you die... just sayin.'

Anonymous said...

We have the misfortune to live in a society that puts a price on everything yet doesn't know the value of anything.

Jon said...

Syar: Maybe I need a headhunter.

Zombies are actually pretty hard to figure out. Really depends on how many shotguns are within a 3 mile radius of your residence, how accurate of a shot are the owners of said shotguns and how high your thirst for brains is. Could be a lot, could be a little.

Madelyn: Maybe I do.

Cofo: I could, but not nearly as many. Turns out you actually need your heart to do something.

Anonymous: The problem is that you can get Value for 10 cents on the dollar on Ebay.